Pervert

I like things that upset many. Hence the title. The earliest occurrence, as far as I can remember, was sparked by Ajahn Lee. Somewhere in his book, he wrote (paraphrased): “Good things are bad things. Bad things are good things. Good things like praise, pleasure, and fame are bad for the heart. Things like criticism and displeasure are good for the heart.” I was pretty puzzled when I first come across this, but after some time, I began to see his point and really appreciated what was said. The deep appreciation comes from the very truth in what Ajahn Lee put across.

Once when I went to a Dhamma class at Mahaprajna, the shifu told us jokingly that he once anyhow gave a Dhamma name Hui Si (Meaning: Can Die) to a lay devotee, and the person got very upset. When I heard that, I thought the name was very nice, and so adopted it myself. I find the name very nice because it’s so much in line with reality, simple yet truthful, in no way trying to deny the truth and instead see it as it really is, in full acceptance.

On another occasion, I read Ajahn Brahm relating a story of the time when he was sick. Ajahn Chah paid him a visit and he got very pleased because he highly regarded Ajahn Chah and it was really an honor to him that Ajahn Chah paid him a visit. However, he got very upset when Ajahn Chah opened his mouth. Instead of consoling him or wishing him well soon, Ajahn Chah said, “You will either get better, or you will die.”

When I read that, I thought that was well-said, and on the right occasion! I would be happy to be offered such words when I got sick. It actually takes quite a bit of courage to speak the truth in such matter-of-factly-manner.

On yet another occasion, BW told me of a strict Zen meditation centre where the teacher will hit the students with a stick if they are sleepy while meditating. I got really excited to learn about that!
There’s a reason for this tendency: I’m constantly seeking for places or occasions that are favourable for cleansing the heart, and getting away from what is favourable to the defilements but endanger the practice! Things that are favourable to the defilements always seem very nice and naturally makes us inclined towards them, like praises, comfort, company of friends, good food, idle talks… Yet, if we let ourselves get carried away by them, they are bound to wipe out the goodness in us: make us forget ourselves, forget the training/ Dhamma, and just be slave to the defilements!