Attachment

Attachment is sometimes so subtle that we fail to see that it is there. It’s only when one’s attachment to something/ someone is challenged that one realizes one is attached to that something.

Today, I was pained when he didn’t respond to me the way I perceived he used to. Before any thoughts came, the feeling of ‘pain’ seeped in. This is how dangerous attachment is. When one is having a good time getting oneself attached to things, one is not even aware that the attachment is there. But when things turn bad, one started to see how one’s attachment to something causes one to suffer.

This pain is a good thing. It awakens me to the fact that I’m attached to someone, and that attachment causes me suffering. Just as physical pain is a bodily protection mechanism to signal to the body that it is endangered, this mental pain is the same. When the pain arises, I know that it’s the thing that I mentally hold on to – in other words, cling to – that has caused the pain. Consequently, I let him go, the way one who holds fire let it go immediately on realizing that fire is harmful.

We can learn a lot from people or things we are attached to. We can learn a lot about attachment. For me, because I am attached to him, I get to learn many valuable lessons. Even when he doesn’t do anything to hurt or harm me, I’d hurt myself by thinking in this or that way, that he is this or that way, or that this or that is what he intends. For this reason, he’s been a great teacher for me.